For reasons I cannot explain, I decided to write this blog post ranking each Democratic presidential candidate’s announcement videos. I don’t think anyone I know cares at all to watch these videos, but I found it interesting to watch and compare how each candidate chose to advertise themselves. Most of these videos follow the same format: talk about their childhood, their working-class parents, and how they overcame adversity, then feature clips of them talking to regular citizens as well as clips of people saying why they like them, then talk about their record of getting things done, and then pitch why they believe they’re the best person to beat Trump. What’s also usually in the mix is quick cuts between many photos, montages of people’s faces, and, sometimes, a drumline.

Watching all of these videos was kind of sad because it reminded me how diverse the field was before most of them dropped out before the first votes were cast.

The hardest part about watching all of these videos wasn’t how many I had to watch, but rather, how to rank them when so many of them are boring and forgettable. But attempted this herculean task. See below for my official ranking of each candidate’s launch videos:

27. Joe Sestak - “Presidential Announcement”

I’m sorry but I did not watch this video. It’s 16 minutes long.

26. Deval Patrick

One of the last Democrats to announce their candidacy (November 2019!), Deval Patrick needed to come out with a bang and show us why he deserves to be the nominee when so many more talented candidates were already in the running. He fails to make this case in this spectacularly bland video.

26. John Delaney - “Why I’m Running”

Delaney was the very first one to announce his candidacy (all the way back in 2017). Much like his campaign, this video was unnecessary and went on for way too long. This m-fer is almost six minutes long!!!! (I watched and wrote this before watching Joe Sestak’s video and realizing how long his video was)

24. Seth Moulton

At nearly four and a half minutes in length, this is way too long for such a low-energy video. Moulton certainly says the right things here, but he simply presents it in the most boring fashion. Also the mix of super professional stock footage with his low-quality candidate footage do not work together at all.

23. Richard Ojeda

I first learned of this badass from Michael Moore’s 2018 documentary ‘Fahrenheit 11/9’. He’s the no-nonsense type and this video is exactly the type of announcement video I’d expect from him. Nothing fancy, no expensive equipment, just filmed on a phone. He doesn’t give AF. But like his two-month campaign, this video was short lived.

22. John Hickenlooper - “Stand Tall”

There’s nothing particularly wrong with Hickenlooper and his launch video, but nothing particularly exciting. It’s a typical announcement video where he recaps his accomplishments and record of getting things done. The video isn’t terrible, but it’s also not particularly memorable.

21. Michael Bloomberg - “Rebuild America”

Bloomberg is the only candidate who doesn’t narrate his own announcement video. Really? You’re a multi-billionaire… I’m sure you can make time for this. The whole video feels like an infomercial. It’s not bad, just tacky.

20. Tim Ryan - “I’m Running for President”

I started watching this video expecting a boring video because I’ve listened to Tim Ryan before, in interviews and debates, and he comes off as a boring person. And while this video doesn’t do anything to change my mind about that, it’s slightly effective. The somber tone presented, along with his narration, kinda works. Also, Tim Ryan oddly looks a lot like former Trump lawyer Michael Cohen.

19. Joe Biden - “America Is An Idea”

Unlike most of the announcement videos, Biden’s is more somber. He spends most of the time talking to the camera, detailing Trump’s many dangerous faults. “We are fighting for the soul of America,” Biden says. I agree. Overall, the video is okay. Calling back to the modern-day white nationalists that have been emboldened by Trump is an effective reminder that what we’re up against is a real threat. However, it’s simply a matter of personal preference for me that I prefer videos from the other candidates that inspire hope rather than settling for fear. The screen transition near the end is also way too similar to Netflix’s.

18. Beto O’Rourke - “Running for President”

This dude talks nonstop for three and a half minutes with no breaks! I literally couldn’t stop watching his hand… it was mesmerizing. I have no idea what he said, though.

17. Amy Klobuchar - “Let’s Get to Work”

You’re going to hear me say this a lot - this video is the standard announcement video. It talks briefly about Klobuchar’s life, goes into her legislative record, and talks about why she’s the best person to be president. Not bad, but not great. That caption typeface looks horrible, though.

16. Steve Bullock - “Fair Shot”

I don’t know much about Steve Bullock, the Governor of Montana. This video does a good job of telling us who he is in a short amount of time. It highlights his record fighting against dark money in politics, support for abortion rights, gay marriage, expanding Medicaide, and still winning in a state Trump won by 20 points. Overall, it’s a standard launch video that does its job, even if it’s a big unmemorable - much like Bullock’s candidacy.

15. Jay Inslee - “Our Moment”

Okay, this launch video starts of unintentionally hilarious with an actress asking “Hey Governor, what do you have to say about climate change?” Washington Governor Jay Inslee is no actor, so I don’t know why he would feature such a heavily scripted scene to start this video off. Like his campaign, the video is fairly one-issue, but it’s understandable. Inslee, like many others, believe Climate Change should be the number one priority right now. It’s an admirable appeal. The video, like his campaign, never really takes off and isn’t too memorable. But it’s not terrible.

14. Eric Swalwell - “Go big. Be bold. Do good.”

I like Eric Swalwell, even if his campaign didn’t really stand out from the sea of other white male candidates. One noticeable difference between his video and others is he actually swears! He says “bullshit” when talking about Trump. Kudos to that. Though it includes a lot of what the typical announcement videos usually include, Swalwell’s feels slightly more authentic. Maybe it’s because he’s talking to us while driving in his car, or his admitting he has massive student loan debt, or it could be the fact that this video doesn’t scream “I’m over-produced!”

13. Wayne Messam - “Your Champion”

Mayor Wayne Messam never got enough support or exposure to make it to the debates so his campaign seemed dead on arrival. This campaign video, however, is good. The cinematography is excellent and the overall video almost feels like a movie. I prefer videos like this where it relies more on actual candidate footage rather than stock footage.

12. Bill de Blasio - “Working People First”

He starts the video by yelling…. So I guess he’s a New Yorker? I don’t know much about Bill de Blasio except that he’s an unpopular mayor, but the video does a good job of highlighting his progressive record: passing $15 minimum wage, universal Pre-K, and guaranteed healthcare. Like how the video starts off, it ends in a startling fashion as well, with an ugly-ass logo.

11. Tom Steyer - “Fundamental Change”

The other billionaire on this list, Steyer is surprisingly appealing considering the other billionaire, Bloomberg, is the exact opposite of what you’d call appealing. Steyer calls back to his family’s history of doing good, with his father being a part of the Nuremberg Trials, and Steyer’s history of giving back and supporting progressive causes. This is a good introductory video to many Americans who didn’t know who Steyer was.

10. Elizabeth Warren

This is kind of a cheat because Warren never released an official announcement video. This video here is announcing her exploratory committee, not her actual campaign. But everything we see here is pretty much what you’d expect from a launch video so I decided to include it on this list. Anyone who knows me knows I’m biased for Warren, so I like what I see in the video, even though it’s a repeat of a lot of what I’ve already heard from her many campaign speeches (that’s a downside of following a campaign so closely - you hear the same stories multiple times). She talks about her history growing up in a working class family, becoming a teacher, and creating a federal agency - before going into politics. It recaps what she’s been saying consistently in her campaign, about how corrupt our current system is and what we need to do to fix it.

9. Marianne Williamson - “New Birth of Freedom”

Marrianne saw Beto’s video, in which he spoke direclty to the camera nonstop with no cuts, and said “Hold my broomstick.” Hearing her speak is never boring, and I appreciate the unprofessional look of her captions. She closes the video by saying “Let’s not be naive,” and I don’t know why, but it felt threatening… and badass.

8. Tulsi Gabbard - “For The Country We Love”

This is a decent launch video, slickly filmed and edited. She talks about the need for change, specifically ending interventionalist wars - a prominent feature of her campaign.

7. Andrew Yang - “Humanity First”

When Andrew Yang announced he was running for president alllll the way back in 2017 (he’s the second person to announce, after John Delaney), no one knew who he was and assumed his campaign was dead on arrival. This was an Asian man running on a platform that would give $1,000 to every single American, so many wrote him off. Little would we know that he’d be one of the last candidates standing in 2019. The video is a great introduction to him as a candidate and why he’s advocating for Universal Basic Income, as the fear of automation displacing workers is real.

6. Cory Booker - “We Will Rise”

Booker launched his campaign on February 1, 2019 - the first day of Black History Month. What makes his stand out is we see him walking through the city of Newark, of which he used to be the mayor, and in which he still lives. “I’m the only senator who goes home to a low-income, inner-city community.” His campaign slogan “We Will Rise” is a callback to the great Maya Angelou.

5. Pete Buttigieg

This is a great introduction to Mayor Pete, using his campaign speech as narration for the video. He calls back to his younger self, one that was less sure about his sexuality and place in this world. It’s effective in showing how far he - and this country - has come that an openly gay man is running for the country’s highest office. Personally, I feel like this video would’ve been even better had he used footage from his youth to complement his speech.

4. Bernie Sanders - “Vision”

Bernie’s videos are almost always well-made, and this one is no exception.This video is a nice recap of the enormous impact Sanders has had on the progressive movement since his historic run for president in 2016.

3. Kamala Harris - “For the People”

After Bloomberg, Kamala Harris has the most commercial launch video for sure. But what makes Harris’s video more palatable is it’s just fun, eye-catching, and memorable. The poppy colors call back to Shirley Chisholm and her historic run as the first woman and Black woman running for president.

2. Mike Gravel - “Rock 2.0”

If you like Bernie Sanders then you’ll love daddy Mike Gravel. A former senator from Alaska, he is most known for being the old man running on a progressive agenda back in 2008. He’s known for his debate performances against opponents that included Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, and Joe Biden. And most infamously, that rock video, which this new launch video calls back to. It’s too bad Gravel wasn’t able to make it to the debate stage, despite receiving enough donations. His staunch views against American imperialism would’ve been great to have on the national stage. I’d also like to point out that Gravel was never a serious contender for the 2020 election. His campaign was literally launched and managed by two 18-year-olds with the intention of getting his message onto the national stage.

1. Kirsten Gillibrand - “Brave Wins”

Gillibrand’s launch video is one of the most memorable ones out of the 2020 candidates, and it’s one of my favorites. The highly-produced video asks “Can brave win?” “Brave doesn’t pit people against each other. Brave doesn’t put money over lives. Brave doesn’t spread hate. Cloud truth. Build a wall. That’s what fear does.” Contrasting Trump’s racist and fear-mongering policies with her progressive record, she talks about what we can accomplish if we’re brave. The kicker is revealed at the end, stating she will make her formal announcement at a rally outside the Trump International Hotel in New York City. Well played.

Michael Bennet and Julian Castro did not release announcement videos. Or, at least, I couldn’t find any. And yes, that means even more candidates ran for president than what I had listed.